Infinite Miracles: Memoir of a NICU Mom

Published by Franklin School Press, 2024

Infinite Miracles is the three-part memoir of my journey as the mother of a medically fragile baby, Tim. As a “mature” mom who was going to be a first-time mom at age thirty-seven, I was ready, excited, and determined to perfectly balance my career and motherhood. So when I learned about my son’s rare fetal diagnosis of an omphalocele, I was stunned. I entered the Stages of Grief Club and surrendered the expectations I had held for the perfect motherhood and perfect child.

Little did I know that my personal transformation had just begun.

I had to adapt to a new medical environment and learn to speak a different language, one full of appointments, specialists, and medical moms like me. And then subtler shifts in my mindset began to happen. I began to interpret challenges as blessings and feel gratitude in the smallest moments. I also developed a powerful sense of perspective and new courage to endure. These small, gradual steps out of despair and the surrender of expectations were attributed to one thing: faith.

This is a story of faith and resilience. It is about my son who endured his first years in the hospital: fifty-four days in NICU and countless days on the pediatric floor and PICU. The miracles I experienced during this time were the gift of life for our son and the faithful endurance to survive the journey. I learned that our everyday moments were infinite miracles. I gave life to Tim, but his life gave me life.